I find myself repeatedly reflecting on reflecting. It is so interesting to me, I think partly because I'm so bad at it. I've been struck lately at how painful it is when I come home from work. School is as fast paced as you can imagine, and to actually just stop when I get home is not pleasant. It's actually painful. It's almost like detox each and every day. I hate it. I don't even mean reflecting, I mean simply stopping. Not picking up things, not doing dishes, not watching tv, not getting on the computer (as I am now :-) ). Simply sitting and stopping. I feel like currently I have no focus for my time outside of school, and consequently I feel like life is work, and I don't enjoy that. I feel like I need to STOP but I don't want to because it's painful in the beginning.

I've never been a good reflector. I simply live in the moment. As I am slowly desiring to move in that direction, I am seeing how complex it really is. It truely is a discipline and I respect anyone who does it well, or attempt it for that matter. That's why I've come to like this blog. Because even if I have not reflected before writing here, the act of writing is a form of reflection.

I'll stop here because all of my thoughts are not formulated, but if anyone has any thoughts on reflection I'd be interested in hearing them.

Thanks. Love you all.